the solar system

i drew a map of the surrounding area. it’s quite large, so i put it in a scroll box.

(if you don’t like scroll boxes click here to see it by itself / zoom in a little)

all of that is on one single long piece of paper. it’s now on my wall.

(nb: i’m not trying to insult mars. it’s just that it doesn’t have any lifeforms. jus’ sayin)

home

a jetpack and a monster

just some guy in a jetpack with a shot gun. no biggie.

sorry about the lack of updates. i’ve been working on multiple projects.

the other day i found this website where a guy turns extracts of his old chat logs into psuedopoems. i liked it. you should read some or all of them.

hamsters are terrible parents

two hamsters talking, one looks kinda fat. the non fat one is saying "did you eat the kids again? you know that shit ain't cool". i thought it was vaguely funny but you're the judge of that, not me. by the way, hello elle, the sole reader of these alt-texts

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i’m not sure how i feel about this one but here it is.

also, if i make t-shirts (not of this, just t-shirts in general), how many people would like one? i don’t want to over/under make them.

also also, what are people’s opinions on those ‘facebook like’ buttons that are everywhere?

bang.

it's a big old gun i think the proper word is revolver because the chamber revolves (yes i that makes sense i'll go with that) and its got a 'splosion coming out the end and its got the word 'bang.' on it. anyway why are you reading the alternate text? anyway i hope you're having a wonderful day

bonus picture:

a tv with some zaps coming out i guess. just look at the photo. i dont know why i write these no one will read them. poo bum fart.

i’m ready

its a yogurt or yoghurt or however you spell it it's one of those in a pot saying "i'm ready" to a spoon. i'm not sure if it's funny or even if it makes sense but guess what i'm going to risk it i hope you like it.

interpret how you will.

i’m not sure how many people like maths but the other day i read this quite interesting paper about minesweeper and using it to makes logic gates, which is pretty cool. you should read it.

T.B.F.F.

turtles tortoise best friend forever friends i don't know i usually just write a bunch of rubbish in these alternate text fields. kinda entertaining

i got more ‘good evening’ posters for those who want to buy them.

hey can i play

it's a monster asking his friend (i think they're friends but who knows, they might be related?) if he can play snes. i like writing these alt-texts, i don't think anyone reads them. poopy poop poop

my friend gave me a humongous roll of paper, and this is the first thing i’ve made with it. it’s about 5 foot wide. click on it if you want to zoom in and look around.

i also drew something for single people awareness day

i don’t have a title for this

this is a picture of a monster or possibly a dinosaur sitting on a chair reading the newspaper. what you can't tell is that he is actually thinking about boobs which is odd because his species is reptilian which means they have no mammary glands.

i found a blog by a man called thomas hunter which i like. you should look at his pictures because they are good. this one made me inordinately happy.

there are more posters if you want one

hey look, posters

*edit* : there are now more prints, go buy one

i liked a picture i did a while ago so i got a bunch of prints of it made, and now if you want you can buy one. i think you should.

the posters are A2, which means they are 16.5 x 23.4 inches (42 x 60 cm) which is pretty big, and printed on nice thick paper. it would look pretty damn awesome on your wall. i’ll sign it too if you want me to.

i’m selling them for £11 (which is $17.76 for you americans) which is way affordable.

(p&p to the uk will be £1.50, to everywhere else it’ll be £2.50 ($4). they’re sent rolled up in a thick cardboard tube).

as these are the first zappa blamma related things ever sold (!), to make it especially awesome i’m making everyone who buys one an individual picture of a monster giving you a compliment, each one hand made and not going to go on the website so it’s just you and me who sees your one. if you buy this you will actually be complimented by a monster and if you don’t want that to happen then you are a crazy person.

click here to buy one

you should get one, it’ll make you happy and me able to afford food, and both of those things are good outcomes

the end of the january monsters

i’m sorry that the last of the january monsters are appearing in february, i feel kinda embarrassed about that. (there were valid reasons)

anywho, here are the last of them, i hope you like them:

my friend zoe chose the colour scheme for number 21 and i think she chose well
29 and 18 are my favourites of this batch. overall favourite is still number ten though.
if you want to see all of them together in one big image then you are in luck because i have made that image.

also please do me a favour and call that relative that you don’t see very often but still love and say hi